Movie Mondays: In the Land of Women

Hello everybody! Welcome to the first edition of Movie Mondays! I hope you all had a very relaxing weekend and that you watched In the Land of Women. I did! I knew nothing about this movie going into it—and I mean nothing. I knew so little that I actually thought it was going to be a comedy. Can you believe that? I was not expecting what a profound amount of emotion it made me feel. I had high hopes considering many of you said it was your favorite movie, and it didn't disappoint. 

Yes, KStew is the prettiest.

Have you ever watched a movie and as time progresses you realize it is pretty much emulating your life?  In the Land of Women had so many parallels to my life growing up that you would think they took all of the shitty aspects of my childhood and made a movie out of it. (Where’s MY 10%?) Here’s the thing—I was never as pretty as Kristen—so it was just MEAN. 

The thing I liked most about this movie was that it was entirely relatable, especially for a girl. It was one blow after the other, you know? And that's how life is--when it rains, it pours. As with every other movie we discuss, I’ll start from the top and then generalize at the end. #LetsDoThis

I have liked Adam Brody since the days of The OC. Seth Cohen was the best. Ever. After that show went to shit (because it DID. Have you SEEN the last season?!) he sort of vanished.  Anyhow, he was funny on TV so I expected nothing less in the movie, and he was good. 

I adore that Carter is a soft-core porn writer. That being said, people who are looking for porn writers should simply look into the world of fanfic. HOLY SHIT. Have you read some of these lemons and then needed to run and take a cold shower and then do other things with your shower head? (<- was that crossing a line? I hope not.) Fanfic is better than any porn I’ve ever seen in my life. The soft-core porn thing definitely made me laugh.

Note: I googled 'Fanfic equals Porn' and got this picture.

Majority of the pictures that popped up were from the Twilight Fandom.

That cracks my shit up.

Post-Carter we finally cut to Lucy (KStew) cruising in her Mazda with her cute as a button sister. Guys, BlondeStew is what’s up, right? I am totally digging the hair. Her relationship with her younger sister is adorable because it seems like the little girl knows everything about Lucy’s life—she is the voice of reason for her big sister. (Something that becomes important later on in the movie) 

Lucy walks inside and that is where she has her first encounter with her mother, Sarah, played by Meg Ryan. I love Meg. When Harry Met Sally? City of Angels? You’ve Got Mail? I loved them ALL.

You can tell by Lucy’s demeanor that her relationship with her mother is beyond strained to say the least. Then the bomb drops that she may have breast cancer and you feel so badly, but Lucy wanted to go with her. She wanted to make that effort to be there for her mother, and in that moment her mother shut her down—not the other way around. Perhaps it was to protect her daughter so that she thought everything would be okay, but it also showed that this wasn’t a one-sided battle between the two of them. 

YESYESYESYESYESYESYES

Cut to grandma. Fuck, I love this grandmother. I love how she always thinks she’s going to die and how she’s super prepared. Do any of you have family members like that in your family? Oh my gosh I do. She was absolutely hilarious in this movie. 

“I haven’t eaten in three weeks.”

“Really?”

“Okay I had some pasta.”

Some elderly people are ones for the dramatics, and that is so my grandmother. She is over the top. Last Labor Day we were at her church because they have a big Italian feast, and she runs part of it because her church is her being. We were in the back of the church using private restrooms and as we walked out she stopped me.

“I want you to give my Eulogy.” She told me.

“WHAT?!” I said trying not to keel over at this proclamation. 

“I choose you. I want you to give it.”

“Why me!?” I asked, “I’m the middle grandchild. It should either be my sister because she’s the oldest or C because he’s the youngest. I’m smack dab in the middle! This isn’t fair!” (middle child syndrome anyone?)

“Because I want you to read it. I’m writing it right now. I’ll let you know when I’m done.”

“You’re writing YOUR OWN EULOGY!?”

“Yes.”

“You can’t do that!”

“Who says? It’s my fucking death.” She told me. 

And just like that I got stuck with the eulogy that my grandmother is currently writing for herself. My family brings this conversation up at every chance we get and she still laughs at me and tells me it’s my duty. If that sounds fucked up to you then you just don’t have a sense of humor and you should get one. Lucky for me she’s one tough lady who isn’t going anywhere any time soon. She works out three times a week with a trainer. She is stronger than I am, and she’s very young because she had my mother at 17. That being said, she is making preparations because she’s convinced she is dying.  This past week P had to leave for a couple of weeks to tend to some sad circumstances back home.

“You are leaving?” She asked him, “Well that’s one person to cross of the list of attendees at my funeral.”

He looked horrified. The rest of my family? They just laughed.

So you see, I understand that grandmother, and I love her even more for her personality. 

Now I’m jumping ahead to Carter’s first walk with Sarah. It is a little glimpse of what is to come between those two. I was like “ruh-roh Carter seems to like Mrs. Hardwicke, emphasis on the Mrs!”

This cannot be going anywhere good.

It was very touching when Meg Ryan talked about being lost in her life because it is a very relatable feeling. Sometimes we are catering so much to everyone around us that when we stop to self-assess we don’t even know who we are. It’s sad, but it’s life, and it happens to each and every single one of us. The real question is what will it take to wake us up? And what are we going to do about it?

“God, I just don't wanna

look back on my life...

...and wonder what part of it

belonged to me.”

So then we find out that Sarah does have cancer, and they decide to tell their daughters individually. The exchange with Paige made me want to throw myself off of a balcony.

I can't even.

“I took $20 from your purse.

Really? When?

A while ago. Last February.

Are you serious?

Yeah.

I've been wanting to tell you for a while.

I'm telling you because other than that,

I don't have any secrets from you.

If you say everything's gonna be okay,

I believe you. And I know you're telling the truth

because you wouldn't lie to me. Maybe to other people...like, maybe to Lucy or maybe to Dad...”

Those of us that have dealt with cancer in some way (which is all of us) all know what that feels like. You just want the person who is sick [who knows the most about their condition] to say everything is going to be fine. Paige was putting it out there that she would never lie—in hopes that her mother wouldn’t lie back—and it broke my fucking heart.

As if you didn’t feel bad enough for the family, Sarah then confesses to Carter that her husband is having an affair, and she isn’t doing anything about it because she lives a good life. To counter that sadness, Carter then tells Sarah that her husband is out of his mind. RED.FLAG. He totes wants to jump her bones.

He defo gave her the candy bar to satiate his oral fixation.

Then we got to the best part of the movie, for me at least. Paige goes to talk to Lucy, and Paige begins rambling off facts about what’s going to happen with their mother's treatment. Lucy then turns to her and says, “All of this doesn’t scare the shit out of you?”

this EXACT moment

I connected with that moment so much, and I can replay my own personal experiences over and over in my head. Sometimes when you find out someone you love is sick you are so overwhelmed and people come at you saying “it will be okay” and all you want to do is cry. Cry because you don’t want to lose that person, but most of all you cry because you are so fucking scared and you pray to God you have that fight within you. And in that moment you need someone. It could be people you’re meeting for the first time—or your own baby sister—but someone to tell you that it’s okay to be scared and that they are there. In the midst of the storm all you need is someone who is level headed—someone who can keep your feet on the ground and your head above water when you so desperately feel as if you are drowning.  Kristen’s deliverance of those 10 words was so honest and so touching that it legitimately brought tears to my eyes.

And then her sister answered with, “Well, of course it does. But since I’m not a breast surgeon or an oncologist there is not a whole hell of a lot that I can do about it tonight.”

Sweet comedic relief in a moment of such vulnerability. Fantastic. 

Then the group goes on their date and they meet Eric Watts. That kid wasn’t very hot… just sayin’. I loved the sister’s reaction. She was so awe struck with him and it was so freaking cute. 

MovieStew bitchface. Loves it.

Another portion of Kristen’s acting that was also riveting for me was when she admitted that she knew of her father’s affair, but that she was mad at her mom because of it. Even if you can’t understand why she feels that way, you have to appreciate the fact that she knows she feels that way. She owned that, you know? There is so much anger that goes with infidelity and it's so hard for kids to know where to place the blame. I know from personal experience, and I was really glad that she said that to Carter.

Back to grandma. I loved when the grandmother was telling Carter about the hospice number on the phone. How morbid, and yet how freaking funny was that? She was one of the best characters in the movie, easily.

Then? Then Carter kisses Sarah and my jaw hit the floor and I muttered, “oh no he didn’t!” Come on man! I understand she’s hurting but like… fuck! She’s your friend’s mother! She’s your neighbor! She’s married! AHHHH!!! The complication factor of this movie just went from 1 to 1,000,000.

bahahahahahahahahahahah. Is this irrelevant? I don't care.

Cut to the high school party. How come I never went to parties like that in high school? Did I grow up in the wrong town? (Note: Still kind of bitter I wasn’t invited to Eclipse’s grad party. Fuck’s that about!?) Parties never turned out to be as cool as they are in movies… why is that? Are you telling me movies aren’t real!? STOP.

It defo looks like she just killed someone and that blood should be

trickling down her fingers.

When the little fight went down I was laughing hysterically. “You think you can step into my hood, slinging game at my girl, drinking my boy’s brew, and expect not to be scrapping directly?” WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN!? Is that how kids talked in ’07? We are fucked in the future, by the way, because I cannot even imagine what kids are saying in 2010.

Eric Watts, FTW. Standing up for Lucy and all. OIC you like her, eh?

When Lucy confesses to Carter as to why her mother and her are so distant I was so proud of Kristen. It wasn’t a seamless story, you know? She stumbled and mumbled and it was hard for her to get out because it was something she was so ashamed of, something she wished her mother had been there for and she just wasn’t. WELL DONE.

Enter second favorite part of the movie during this scene. Carter tells Lucy to let all of her hate for her mother go and she says why? And he says, “because she might die… I’m trying to wake you up.” As a viewer I finally breathed out because you want to smack Lucy upside the head and say PLEASE stop because you could lose your mother! 

all THREE of them are in this kiss?! Where's meg!?

Then they kiss. That’s a bomb ass kiss. It was perfect and dramatic and I love how you can SEE her working up her courage to kiss him. Have you ever done that? I never had the balls to do that, but fuck I wish I did. Then Carter tells Lucy he can't (I hate when boys say that line) and that ends their rather quick fling.

Then Sarah collapses and Lucy realizes what a piece of shit her father really is. GOOD. 

Look at her face. 

I was hoping that by the end of the movie they would chop his dick off to make an example out of him. I hated that he was never held accountable for what a terrible man he was. That being said, the look Lucy gave him when he finally showed up at the hospital? Priceless.

When Sarah and Lucy finally conversed I felt so fucking good. Lucy admitting she didn’t even know why she hated her mother was such a huge deal and it was a very special moment. And the mother simply responded she would just keep loving her. And then KStew cried and hugged her—and I was like—yes, this is how it should be.  Everyone was getting to where they were supposed to be, and it felt so good. So then Lucy is driving, turns around, runs to her Orange Julius boy and GETS IT! YOU GO GIRL!!!! She knew—she just knew.

As the movie winds down and all of the women are finally getting what they want, grandma dies. How sad right? She was the shit, but it was a very full circle moment, you know? It still didn’t make it any easier to see the charming lady pass.

C: So you wanna like, read my stuff?

Waitress: Nah, I bet it sucks. Mkay, bye!

I liked the little ending in a coffee shop as well. Carter finally found a girl who gave a shit. Cute ending and very hopeful in regards to every character.

This movie was great, seriously. It actually made me think as opposed to a comedy, you know? He helped all of the women and they helped him. Adam did a great job. Meg did a phenomenal job, and Kristen was amazing.  The range of emotions that she had to possess within this movie gave ME whiplash. From the vulnerable teenager afraid to kiss a guy to a girl who hates her mother who is suddenly diagnosed with cancer; she had to face it all. And she did, and she did it in a very believable way. I watched an interview she did for this movie and she said that she was going through the same feelings in her real life as she was in the movie... perhaps that's why she was so good. All of the emotions were there and I was so very impressed with her performance. In the Land of Women was great, and I’m so glad I finally got to watch. 

K: "Please stop talking about my hair, CC."

Because she did an exemplary job playing Lucy Hardwicke, KStew is better than you.

[A/N: Jeebus I didn’t know this movie was sad and yet rather charming and funny! What did you all think of the movie? Favorite scenes? Dislikes? As always, let me know what you think. We will discuss and I will see you guys Friday!]